Compromise is a Beautiful Thing

or "How we annoyed our venue enough that they finally gave in to make the phone calls stop"

After all of the i's were dotted and the t's crossed on our contract with our venue, we asked a question that we neglected to ask prior to signing on that bottom line.  It's our own fault really for not asking earlier as we had at every other venue we interviewed.  But we were just so excited about finding the perfect place that... well.. we just forgot. 

So the conversation went a little something like this:

Venue:  Now that we have your date set we should discuss when you want your rehearsal.

Me:  Oh, yes.  Friday night.

Venue:  Typically, our policy is Thursday night rehearsals.

Me:  Yes but 95% of our wedding party is coming from out of town so we need it to be Friday.

Venue:  Well, we schedule weddings on Friday evenings so 3 weeks before your wedding, if there isn't a wedding scheduled, we can change it to Friday.  Just keep calling once a month up to your wedding and checking on the status of that Friday night.

Me:  .... ummm... oookay 

Needless to say, I wasn't happy with their "policy".  Now, I'm not trying to go all bridezilla on you all but I feel like they were being completely unreasonable.  The mister called them later to discuss this further.  Their conversation went something like this.

Mister:  I wanted to check on the status of October 14th and see if there was a wedding scheduled.  We'd like to have our rehearsal on Friday night.

Venue:  That's not our policy.  There's no wedding but there are still people booking dates in October.

Mister:  What about Friday morning?  We'd be out of there before the wedding and it would mean that people could fly in late Thursday and not take the day off work.

Venue:  So sorry sir but from our experience this doesn't work.  People show up late to the rehearsal and it cuts into our time to set up for the Friday wedding. 

Mister:  Okay, I guess I'll call back in a month or so.

And he did... and here's how that conversation went: 

Mister:  We're about 5 months out from our wedding and we wanted to see if we could have our rehearsal on Friday night.

Venue:  There's no wedding scheduled but our policy is rehearsals on Thursday night.  Three weeks before we can change it to Friday if there's no wedding scheduled.

Mister:  Okay, but our wedding party are all flying in and need to purchase their flights.  Thursday night forces them to take another day off of work.  Friday night doesn't.  Many of them won't be able to be present on Thursday night.

Venue:  Let me transfer you to the owner.

Mister:  Okay.

Venue Owner:  (basically repeats everything that person 1 told us)

Mister:  Seriously, we need to schedule it before 3 weeks before the wedding.  People need to buy flights.

Venue Owner:  How many of your wedding party are coming from out of town?

Mister:  All of them.

Venue Owner:  Even parents and grandparents?

Mister: Yes.  Even them.

Venue Owner:  Okay, in 1 month call back and if there's no wedding we'll schedule it for Friday night.

And I'm sure the mister wishes the conversation above was that short or even that pleasant.  But unfortunately, it wasn't.  But here we sit 1 month from that conversation and the mister makes yet another phone call.  Still no wedding scheduled.  They're a business, I get that, so they want to make as much money as possible on Friday night.  A wedding is much more money than our rehearsal.  But the way I look at it is I'm paying almost twice as much as a Friday or Sunday wedding so that I could have my wedding on Saturday.  I did that so that the many many people coming from out of town wouldn't have to take more time off work.  Since we're paying more, they should be willing to compromise.  We were fine with a Friday morning rehearsal.  Just not Thursday night.  What I should have done is directed all of the phone calls and emails I was getting from family and friends who were unhappy with the Thursday night rehearsal to the venue.  They probably would have compromised much sooner if they had to listen to the complaints as much as I did. 

I will tell you that finally after about 5 conversations with these people they decided to be reasonable and let us do the rehearsal on Friday morning.  So, I'm happy with the compromise.  But seriously, what a hassle!  I've definitely learned from this experience though.  Ask all of your questions before you sign on that bottom line.  Even if it's the perfect vendor, make sure you know what you're getting yourself into. 

Personal Taste and Tradition: Two Worlds Colliding

I've been looking for the perfect song to play when I'm walking down the aisle.  I love the sound of the traditional music but I really wanted something a bit more modern.  I'm not really a formal, traditional person so it's hard to find an appropriate balance between the whole "this is the only wedding I'll ever have so it better be good" mentality and the "I want my personality and taste to be clear in all the details" mentality.

As with most people who are planning weddings, my fiance is not my first boyfriend.  I've been on both the giving and receiving end of the pain that comes with ending relationships.  This thing that I have with my FI is real.  It's amazing and I'm so excited to start this next chapter of our lives together and leave behind my past.  So I was looking for a song that really spoke to my history and our relationship, without being too cheesy.  Which, in the world of love songs, is a difficult task. 

The first song that came to mind is probably not one that anyone would ever guess.  When we first started dating, we used to just sit and be together while we listened to music, just enjoying each other's company.  A band that made an often appearance in this time together was Snow Patrol.  So the song, Chasing Cars, has a lot of really fond memories for both of us.  If you aren't familiar, take a listen.  Just a quick disclaimer: I don't own this video or the music contained with in.  I'm just sharing it with you all!

Source

As much as I love me some Snow Patrol, it doesn't scream wedding ceremony to me.  So I moved on to other songs that might be a bit more appropriate.  I had pretty much settled on God Bless the Broken Road by Selah.  I know Rascal Flatts has a very popular version of this song but the Selah version sounds so much less country and so much more wedding appropriate.  Take a listen.  Again, I don't own the music, video, pictures, or anything contained in this video. 

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I still love this song because I think it really speaks to our relationship.  But I will say that I would be quite a different person today had I not dealt with (and dealt out) the heartache in past relationships.  It made me who I am today and brought me straight to my mister.  I am thankful for all of the pain I endured over the years because I'm finally with the right person.  Sometimes you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince.

A few weeks ago I was browsing through songs on youtube because there was still something that just wasn't right about our ceremony music.  I felt like the lyrics of the song were perfect but it just wasn't.. perfect.  I stumbled upon an instrumental cover of a popular song.  The band performing the cover was Vitamin String Quartet.  They do a TON of covers of popular songs and I love the idea of instrumental music in our ceremony.  And so I was on a mission to find the perfect song that they'd covered.  After making a list of about 8 songs that I'd be happy with I stumbled upon this.

Source

You can't even begin to imagine my excitement when I found this song.  So guess what folks?  This is it!  This is the song that I'll walk down the aisle to.  It's the last song I'll hear as a single person.  And you know what?  It's perfect.

 

Event Insurance: Is it worth the money?

Sorry for the lack of posting.  My life has gotten considerably more busy so it's been tough to sit down for a moment and collect my thoughts.  But, rest assured, I'm still in full swing planning mode.  So what project am I working on currently?  Well, if you ask theknot.com, my checklist has about 53 overdue items.  So, I'm really trying to figure out how much of those things REALLY need to be done right now and how many can wait just a little bit longer.  Needless to say, there are quite a few things on that list that probably should be done sooner rather than later.  So, I'm multitasking.

One thing that we are researching right now is Wedding/Event insurance.  Our venue recommends it and it's not super expensive or anything, but I'm just not sure if it's a cost that is really all that important.  I understand that if something happens to my dress or if a vendor goes suddenly out of business, our insurance kicks in and covers our butts.  But what if we're paying money for something that's already covered by our vendors?  I mean, even though our venue recommends it, if their roof caves in because of hail, certainly they have insurance to cover that.  I guess it just protects our investment so that if a tornado picks up our venue and moves it from Georgia to France we're not stuck on 6 hour plane ride so we can still get married without losing all of our money. 

So what's your advice?  Would you purchase the insurance?  Or if you're already married, did you purchase the insurance?  What made you decide the way you did?